Rizal's Mother, The Moth Story and You

I’ve been very weak throughout these years.  Emotionally, mentally and physically.  There are times even spiritually. I get tempted easily. I also cry and breakdown a lot. I easily get hurt.  And I try to seek revenge on those who hurt me or my loved ones. I’m trying to change. But we all have our kryptonite. No matter how strong we think we are, there are still those things that instantly trigger our weaknesses.  Some are guilty pleasures. Those that we try to avoid but we seem can’t.  We may be successful at times and when we think we’re durable enough to face them, they return to us hard and pushing us down to our knees while feeling helpless.

We were taught at school about the moth story that Teodora Alonzo told to the then young Jose Rizal, her son. According to well-known historian Dr. Ambeth Ocampo, when Lolay couldn't get Pepe to focus reading a Spanish book entitled "El Amigo de Los Ninos", she shifted in telling him a story. Then she succeeded taking Pepe's attention. 

Burning oil lamp

 




It's initially understood as a story of disobedience between a young lad and his elder. You probably are familiar with what happened to the young moth in the story. It got too attracted to the burning light of the oil lamp despite warnings from the older moth not to get too close to the fire. So its wings caught fire, burned and it died. While hearing the story from his mother, Rizal was actually watching the moths flying around their table lamp. And it indeed got too close to the fire and shared the fate of the young moth in the story.

Another angle that historians thought that could have affected Rizal's thinking was how daring the moth became to go beyond the limits. To search for further knowledge outside the norms and trying to go beyond its comfort zone while risking danger that goes with all of it. Which is actually what happened to Rizal for knowing too much and saying too much that he gained the ire of the nation's colonial government then which eventually put him to death.

There's definitely a lot of wisdom you can get from that simple moth story  and I think I can see another one. I can relate this to the usual overestimation of our own self-control. We always think that we are above our urges. We supposedly are. Though being around the trigger is never a good thing to test it. Just like how the moth enthralled by the beauty of the burning light, we will all get sucked into the fire if we continuously play with it.

It is like a temptation for a wrong relationship. Though fully aware of it being wrong, we hear people saying they are just trying to be friendly. Ignoring the risk of getting deeper into it thinking that they are in control, they continue with it.  And then got burned later as expected.

It's cool if you're burning like this.

Then there are youth starting out with vices thinking that it's just part of their "growing up years".  Pressured by peers, they tried it while thinking they can easily get out after the first try. They think they are strong and different. Because nothing happened at the first time, they tried again. And again.  And again. And they got burned.

Then there's someone who gets a business proposal. An illegal one. Just a one-time big-time thing as he's told. It will earn big bucks and very low risk of being caught at all. Salivating by the idea of huge amounts of money, he jumped in. And it happened as promised.  They earned big and didn't get caught. After a while, he was asked for another shot. It was good at first so the wall of hesitation slowly crumbled. Then it became a part of his system. He's gaining big and not getting caught.  Until he got burned.

Are you the young or the older moth?

The burning light is beautiful, tempting, attractive but always dangerous. We think that we are in control then we try to play around the fire until it becomes a habit too hard to break. It is always too late to notice that families get broken, people get addicted to vices and illegal doers get caught, arrested or get killed. It's always too late to realize that our wings are already burning.

I’m still trying to work around the kryptonites of my life.  I guess I’ll simply accept that I’m weak. If I’ll be more aware that I am too weak to face them or even just to get near them, then I might just go avoiding them at all. At the onset, I’ll be staying away. Because I am weak.  And by being conscious of my weaknesses, it will now become a part of my strength.

By the way, you can be the “older moth” and warn the others about the dangers of the fire by sharing this blog post. Thanks.