Selective Sympathy, Is There Such A Thing?

Sympathy is a natural emotion and reaction of feeling empathy towards the misfortune of others. It cannot be called selective because if it is, it will not be natural and therefore, it is not sympathy. But it will only exist understandably on what captures the attention, for human time is limited and it can not all the time outward looking.

But frustration and disappointment are different. They must not be mistaken for sympathy. When it is the fireman who burns the house, that's frustrating. When it's the doctor that injects deadly virus to the patient, that's disappointing. But when the thief steals someone's property, you'll sympathize with the victim, but will you get similarly disappointed or frustrated with the thief?

You may also sympathize with the owner of the house that got burnt, and the patient who acquired the virus but you will NOT put in much thought on getting frustrated and disappointed with the thief equalled to how you feel with the doctor and the fireman. 

There's a standard, expectation and most importantly "trust" to what roles we expect the fireman and the doctor to accomplish. And yet when they do the opposite, it's frustrating and disappointing, "trust" gets tainted, psyche gets rattled and so we "panic". 

While for the thief, we "expected" him to do bad things. If you don't believe me, just think of the reason why you close your doors, put the locks and tighten your security. And it is also "expected" for the thief to face the law and gets penalized for what is expected of him. It is natural to avoid getting victimized by the thief, yet it is unnatural to avoid the doctors in times of sickness or to think that the fireman will be the one to put our houses on fire.

So no, there is no such thing as selective sympathy. There is only sympathy, and then there is frustration and disappointment.

His Will But Will You?

God provides us chances, opportunities, direction, guidance and even the desire to do what is good and what is right. Yet, He also gave us free will.
Despite having all of these and still not doing anything with them in your life, don't ask God why when you are feeling down. Ask yourself why you did not act when you had the chance to prepare. 

But the good thing is that everyday is a chance given to us to start again.

Our Hearts' Desires

We rarely notice that we have this tendency of demeaning the naturally good or amoral things. Some of the most common examples are decency, money and being a churchgoer. It is done usually by equating the first one to a cloak for a darker character, the second as a sign of greed or materialism, and the latter for being a hypocrite.

Examining deeper, such behavior is actually a result of frustration or envy. Like for how some succumbs to the hardships of self-control than striving for decency in spite of failing constantly. And on how the misfortune of others are blamed upon those who are better of in terms of material wealth while finding faults and attributing it to their affluence. Lastly for those who surrendered to the pressures of sins while trying to drag with them those who continuously persevere despite acknowledging their status of being a sinner. 

To summarize it, while having different reactions, deep in our hearts we all have the same desires for we all have the same Creator. 

Treat First Chances as Your Last

My blog's 5th anniversary will be happening this month. Since I started with this blog, a lot of great opportunities opened up for me and I've known a lot of people because of it and many of them became good friends. 

I can say that this blog gave me a lot of chances in life. And I do hope I used them all wisely. Here's to more fruitful years to come for all of us. Thank you my dear readers.



Lose Yourself cover by yours truly

Mind Conditioning is Real

Make no mistake about it. Propaganda and mind conditioning techniques are alive and kicking. It's easier now compared to how it was done during the yesteryears with the technology at the disposal of those who intend to do it. When you think you are good enough not to be affected by it, then you make yourself more vulnerable. Once you find yourself hateful of a person or a group and sounds like you're ready to bite at anything that is about them no matter how harmless the news may sound, then you are infected. You will not accept any reasoning at all. You are not willing to meet in between nor even agree to disagree. You just want them destroyed. You want them to disappear. You are hateful. You are mind-controlled.

What you can do to get out of it is to realize your own humanity. Your frailties as a person, that what you are is not far from what others might be. That there are considerations that they have that we don't know about. That there are factors that are affecting these people that we are not aware of. After doing that, you still might not agree with them strongly. You might still have the same stand. But you'll lose the hatred. You'll snap out of the conditioning. And you'll start to stand (again) for your principles. 

Omniscient, You Are Not

It is one thing to speak about the things you have knowledge about and another to make a conclusion about things you are not aware of. Not seeing nor hearing does not always mean they do not exist nor happen. The only thing certain is you didn't see or hear and in itself does not mean anything about the subject but to the observing person's limitation and awareness.

Criticism and Judgement

We all commit sins and make mistakes. And by acknowledging that fact, it implies that it is within our capacity to judge either inwardly or outwardly if something is amiss.

And it is our duty to call the wrong things we see despite being imperfect ourselves. For justice and order could only be attained if we guard each other's actions since most of the time, we misjudge our own deeds due to personal bias and survival tendencies. No one should be beyond criticism. And being shut down for whatever reasons including being called out for the mistakes that one had done in the past or in the present is an injustice in itself. The proper way to address criticism is to listen first and reflect, not to look for ways to criticize in return and be defensive right away. Everything has its time.

Learn From All To Learn All

A broken clock would tell you the right time twice in a day. While another one which is adjusted a minute in advance will always show you what is close to the exact time but it will never tell the accurate hour at any moment. Just like how truth and wisdom is not a monopoly among the learned and educated. They might tell you what seems to be the right thing, but don't settle right away. Widen your options. For we can always learn a thing or two even from the most unexpected places, things, situations or person. While there might be obvious sources from where you can get the information you want, discriminating due to presumptions will always be a disadvantage to someone who truly seek for truth and knowledge.

Find Your Reason

Hold on to your reasons, not to your plans. You may have the most detailed list of your next action items for the coming days. But if the reason you have for making those plans isn't solid enough, then those steps are useless. Set your priorities first and from there, you'll find the compelling reasons needed to identify your next steps and you'll never have to formulate those pointless plans ever again.

Create Your Luck

Luck is an opportunity that comes to someone who's deserving and ready of such privilege. Being at the right place at the right time when a good thing comes is not luck for merely going to that place or staying there for that moment is an effort and a decision in itself. And even if a good chance arrives at someone but is not prepared, it is more probable that it will harm instead of benefiting that person.

Again, It's Logic First

Most of the inconsistencies and bad decisions whether in relationships, career or even politics are made when people let emotion get in the way of logic and start thinking too much about self gain. On the other hand, choices taken are usually better when one puts on his thinking cap first and begins to truly care for others.

Balancing Act

Whenever we are presented with a challenge or an opportunity, you always get two options. First is to take action, and second is to make an excuse and justify why you don't need it. Whichever your choice may be, either of them will cost you time. And it is time alone that will tell if you have chosen to spend it correctly.

Expertise Is Gold

In baseball, an experienced batter can decide within a split second to swing on a pitch or not. His experiences give him the advantage to make quick good judgement. He knows when it's better to wait for the next ball than make do with what's facing him at that moment. Just how it is that a knowledgeable person understands that he does not need to grab every enticing chance that life throws at him. Discernment, and proper management of energy and time are privileges of the learned and the prepared.

Start From The Bottom

"No where to go but up" does not only apply to success but also to character. Acknowledging that there will always be people who are better than you in many aspect will open more doors to knowledge and improvement. By keeping in mind that we aren't always right will also pave way for better understanding. Humility is indeed the mother of all virtues.

Move The Stars

One line that divides laziness and patience is on how you position yourself while waiting for an opportunity to come. Are you just sitting back while waiting for the stars to align or are you the one pushing them to move towards your favor?

Values Are Forever

Doing things in a wild and loud manner is as being true to self as when one is prim, proper and silent. It's just that many of those who choose the former think that these are the only way of expressing themselves for it being the easier one by today's pop culture where formality and self-restraint are re-framed as hypocrisy and vulgarity as honesty. Don't mind the society though. The narratives will change, but human values will not.