Now is NOT the RIGHT Time

There was a time that I had been so paranoid. This was when I became sickly. I was always thinking that I would die anytime soon. Then there were news about bombings everywhere. And I frequently saw those pickpockets doing their thing just in front me. One time, I was a riding a fully loaded bus from Greenhills going to Cainta. I was standing. Then I saw this short fat guy in front of me trying to take something from the bag of a lady who was standing beside him. 

He noticed that I was looking at what he was doing. Another middle-aged man just beside him who I thought was with him gave me the stare trying to warn me to stay quiet. But I didn’t. I did make some noise and movements to take the attention of their prospected victim. I was successful and they were not able to take anything from the woman. And I was stupid doing that since I didn’t know who else was with them or what they might have done to me. 

Ingat sa Mandurukot

Good thing there are other people on the bus that seemed to be vigilant as well and probably they felt that. Unsuccessful, they shouted at the driver to stop. I helped them by saying “Ma, para daw”. And they left the bus quietly but not without another stare at me while saying “wala na tayo magagawa dyan”. They were angry. And I was smiling at them while I was facing them as they walk towards the bus exit. I was also nervous since they might do something like poking me with a knife or anything to hurt me. I was prepared to defend anyway. I put my big bag in front of me and positioned my leg for a quick kick if ever they tried to go near me. But they didn’t and I was lucky. I could be dead now.

Moving forward, things didn’t change that much. I’m not that sickly anymore but I can’t say I became healthier even though I’m trying to. The news is still the same or even worse, actually. And we hear more bad elements roaming around preying on innocent people. Same stuff. Worse stuff. One thing that’s better though is I’m less paranoid. I try not to think of what might happen. I just savor and enjoy what’s happening. Since now is what’s important. Now matters. Now is real. Now is NOT the RIGHT time but it is the ONLY time. What might be is just all in the mind.

Start With The Obvious

Our brains seemed predisposed into always looking for the secrets, the conspiracies, and the hidden. And often that we leave out the obvious. And we can observe that people are more and more becoming gullible on the things they see, hear and read. No matter how outrageous some stories are, they will quickly react and won’t even bother to verify the information. And then share it. Satires make rounds and you see people accepting them as truth. Funny at first. But once seeing a huge number who do the same, it’s not funny anymore. Comedy becomes tragedy since it affects the society in general.

Your brain is always looking for this.

More often than not, the important details are found on the obvious. But these are also the ones that we miss a lot. We try to look for the hidden behind the walls, under the table or inside the circle that the essentials staring at our face are ignored. We love tickling our brains with the stealthy stuffs. The sad part is that a lot of us make choices because of the unverified which usually appeal more to the emotion. And we tend to disqualify the important details and statistics that could have helped us make a sound a better judgment.

Living Together in Loneliness

We all know the feeling of being alone. It is a natural human emotion that all of us experience, some at a specific point in time while some are lonely most of their lives.

Sometimes, you want to do something different from what the others are doing. You may also have an idea contrary to what the majority thinks. And you know that in all angles, nothing’s wrong with your idea and what you’re trying to do. And you understand the thing very well while the others don’t. But you will find people who just don’t want you to continue and to go on. They will attack you, your idea and your action. They will try to embarrass you in public trying to expose how stupid you are to think that something in contrary to what most people believe will work. 

They will drag you and push you down. They will force you to change your mind. They will try to make you act and think like them.  For them, you can’t be serious in thinking opposite of what they are.  

But most of the time, these people are lonely. Not just physically. It’s something deeper. And they are not aware of it but their action speaks louder about it. They won’t let other people move away from them, much more think or act differently. They feel safe and secured with others thinking and acting like them. They get angry and emotional when you say something different. They will not try to understand. They won’t understand. They are lonely and emotional. Behind the anger is the truth that they want to be beside you, to hug you and to kiss you that you’ll be with them forever. And that you will live together in loneliness.

Would you join them?

They want you to be lonely just like them. Knowing that other people do the same as they are creates an illusion of togetherness. But in the end, all of them will end up feeling reclusive while just doing and thinking the same thing. You may not be doing just like them. They may insult you and speak you harsh words for being in contrast with them.  But it’s a choice that you can make. That is deciding to finally feel the warmth of being together with the things and idea that you truly love.

Sariling Kahulugan sa Paggawa

Nakakabaliw na nga. Sa dinami dami ng mga nangyayari sa paligid at sa iyong sarili, madalas ay napapaisip ka kung bakit ka nga ba nandito at kung bakit para bang walang nangyayaring maganda at palala ng palala lang ang mga sitwasyon.

Marami sa atin ang hindi nakakausad sa patuloy na paghahanap at pagtatanong kung ano nga ba ang kahulugan at layunin natin sa buhay. Minsan kang mapapaisip at hinahanapan mo agad ng malalim na sagot ang tanong na ito. Naiisip mo naman minsan na suerte ka pa dahil maayos ang lagay mo kesa sa iba. At nakakatulong ka pa nga sa nangangailangan. Pero sandali lang at malilimutan mo na ito uli. At pagkatapos ay malulungkot at malulugmok ka na naman. Hindi naman kasi talaga magandang batayan ang kalagayan ng iba para maging masaya ka. 

Sapat na ang malaman mo ang halaga ng eksaktong bagay na ginagawa mo sa ngayon. Hindi mo na kailangang ikumpara pa sa iba o kaya naman ay gawan pa ng malalim na pag-iisip. Kung ang ginagawa mo ay nakakatulong sa iba at sa sarili mo, ulit-ulitin mo lang. Pag alam mo ito, paniguradong mas gaganahan ka. Kung tingin mo ay may mali, ayusin mo at baguhin mo ang dapat palitan.

Wag mo nang palalimin masyado. Hayaan mo nang ang ginagawa mo ang siyang magbigay ng hubog sa kahulugan ng buhay mo at ng pagkatao mo. Ang mahalaga ay alam mong ang ginagawa mo ay tama, gusto mo, at nakakatulong at nakakaapekto ng mabuti sa kapwa mo at sa sarili mo.

Kabigin Ang Manibela Ng Buhay

"Wala na kong magagawa at ganito na lang talaga ang buhay ko kaya magtitiis na lang ako."

Ang pangungusap na yan ang ibig sabihin ng ibang tao kapag tinanong mo kung ano ang pangarap nila sa buhay, kung ano ang gusto pa nilang magbago o kung gusto pa nilang guminhawa ang buhay nila at ang sinasagot sa yo ay "kuntento na ko sa simpleng buhay". Yan ang sabi ng marami sa tin. Sasabihin niya sa yo na ok na siya ngayon. Masaya na siya sa ganito lang. Di na siya nangangarap pa ng mataas.

Pero madalas mo rin naman siya marinig na maraming reklamo sa buhay. Sana ganito, sana ganyan. Kung ganito lang sana ang ginawa nya dati. Kung ganito lang sana yung ginawa ng iba. At kung anu-ano pang sana. Pero kuntento daw siya. Pero mas madalas pa siya magreklamo sa buhay kesa sa kumilos at umaksyon sa nirereklamo niya.

Ano ba talaga ang ibig sabihin ng kuntento? Ito ay yung masaya ka sa kung ano ang meron ka at di na naghahangad pa. At masaya ka sa kung ano ang meron naman ang iba. At hindi pagiging kuntento ang kawalan ng pag-asa na may iaayos pa ang buhay mo at yung pakiramdam na wala ka nang magagawa pa kaya di ka na lang nag-iisip na puede pang magbago ang sitwasyon mo. 

Hindi rin ito laging tungkol sa materyal o pinansyal na bagay. Ito rin ay puedeng tungkol sa iyong relasyon sa mga taong nasa paligid mo o kaya ay sa pananampalataya at paniniwala mo. Ang pagiging kuntento ay hindi ibig sabihin pagtyatyagaan mo na lang ang isang bagay dahil tingin mo ay wala ka nang magagawa. Dahil habang buhay ka, may magagawa ka pa. Bawat bagay na gagawin mo gaano man ito kaliit, malaking pagbabago ang magagawa nito sa kinabukasan mo. 

Tulad yan ng manibela ng isang sasakyan, kahit simpleng kabig lang ang gawin mo, malilihis ka na ng direksyon at anggulo ng pupuntahan mo. At ang pagiging kuntento ay hindi ibig sabihin ititigil mo na ang sasakyan. Ayos lang naman huminto paminsan-minsan. Pero kung pe-preno ka, sana ay hindi para huminto ng tuluyan, kundi para pag-aralan kung san mo ikakabig ang iyong gulong patungo sa lugar na syang gusto mong puntahan. Buhay mo yan Ikaw ang humawak ng manibela at wag mong ipa-maneho sa iba. At samahan mo rin ng panalangin bago ka umarangkada.