There are instances in life where you find yourself trapped in a sinking ship and the only way to save the rest is for someone to sacrifice himself, do a kamikazee and bring down the biggest enemy with him and provide all who were left on board a chance for survival. Someone has to play the hero part and die for the rest.
But if you choose to take that kamikazee part, unlike in a real war, you'll live to see what happens next. Sometimes, there are after effects that are bitter to swallow. Just remember, it's part of the sacrifice. And that your goal then is for the whole ship to survive which is what satisfies your chosen action.
And since you're alive, you'll have another chance to regroup and reset your goals while you wear that experience as a badge and as a lesson towards your next battles.